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Giftedness

Giftedness is involuntary – a natural gift. It gives no cause for claims of elitism.

This is Russell Zachary Catilo Tan. He’s 6. He was born on November 15, 2013 at Thomson Medical Centre in Singapore.  He is our first son, a beautiful gift from above. He was born healthy and very red. I delivered him via CS. I couldn’t breastfeed him when he came out since I didn’t have milk then. Over the few weeks since he was born, I managed to pump milk, though my milk supply was not much back then. I stopped giving him my milk when he was 6 mos old and but got him vitamins and supplements when he was about 1.

I remembered, when he was in my tummy, I always listened to Mozart playlist from YouTube and I ate the usual food minus the junk food except for the occasional Wendy’s Frosty I craved for, which my husband bought on his way home.

Moving forward, I could tell as a mother that he has something special. When he was about 2 years old, he used to wake up at around 2am. We always asked him to go back to bed to sleep some more, but he refused to do so. And so, I usually gave him activities (ipad, usually) to spend his time on while my husband and I go back to sleep. He learned to navigate the ipad at that early age, watching mother goose club and his favorite alphabet songs again and again. In this way, he learned to read by himself when he was 3. His early morning activities continued – we usually gave him jigsaw puzzles to solve and he will not stop until he completes the puzzles – from small 20-pc puzzles, to 100-pc puzzles. As he grew older, he showed interest in numbers watching his favorite Number Blocks and Number Jacks. At the age of 4, we gave him activities from Kumon books, starting with addition, subtraction, multiplication, and even division. He loved watching educational shows such as the outer space and the planets. He learned how to play the piano. He absorbed them all. He showed interest and somehow I even ended up researching for other materials to help him through. He is a fast learner and has a bottomless thirst for knowledge.

I knew that my oldest son is gifted. It was confirmed to us by an RTLB (Resource Teachers of Learning Behaviour) resource person who has done observations and assessments of our son’s behaviour and learning at school. His teachers advised us to seek help from RTLB due to some distracting behaviour that is not only affecting others, but also impacts his ability to learn in class since he refuses to form relationships with his classmates.

At first, I was so hesitant to get this done for our son even at the urgings of my husband. Sometimes, as parents, we couldn’t get how our son’s behaviour can be very difficult to manage, as he often ignores directives from us. We know that our son is different, but for me, it’s OK to be different as I am the one who knows him better from the start. So we gave it a go.

It was good that we discovered this early so we can do our best to help our child to excel. The NZAGC (NZ Association for Gifted Children) and QAGTC (The Queensland Association for Gifted and Talented Children) organizations support the gifted children and their families here in NZ. His teachers finally has a guide on how to handle his learning, and has initiating a program to help us to cope up with our son’s social, emotional issues, and to keep track of his performance and progress.

All credits to the following sources whom were also provided by RTLB.

It’s very easy to misunderstand gifted children as they often have some of the behaviours of children with ADHD. As we have learned about having a gifted child. I’ve learned about the characteristics and some traits of a gifted child.

* Have an unquenchable thirst for knowledge.
* Catch on quickly to concepts the first time they are presented.
* Are creative thinkers and problem solvers.
* Are very observant of everything going on around them at all times.
* Retain a large volume of knowledge.
*Enjoy challenging tasks that would often discourage their peers.
*Become so engrossed in their work everything else is blocked out.
*Never want to make a mistake – striving always for perfection.
*Enjoy playing thinking games.
*Use a large speaking vocabulary.
*Do work well above grade level.
*Get bored when the work is too easy.

You may also check here (https://www.giftedchildren.org.nz/what-is-giftedness) if your children have the signs of giftedness.


And this source will help your gifted child to overcome all these challenges and show you steps to help your child thrive.

https://www.familyeducation.com/school/coping-giftedness/9-challenges-facing-gifted-children-how-you-can-help

Badminton ❤️

Back track to where I was single,
I was grateful that I was sorrounded by group of friends. My friends invited me to join them and part of our weekend activity is playing badminton.

It was a nice day. We were having our casual badminton game at SG, Kembangan. I was waiting for my turn on the court, one of our play buddies whom I met for the first time approached me to  practice hitting on the stage hall while waiting for my turn. At first, it was awkward, but I don’t remember if we were introduced but we kept playing, practice hitting the shuttle back to each other. It was not love at first sight, there was not even a spark at first meet, it was a destiny.❤️

I remembered during some of our Badminton games, not knowing you were behind me, waiting for the bus stop, and we had a good conversation back then. 😊

And many more meetings that we just had fun as good friends not knowing you were giving me a hint that you like me. And as partner in badminton, you even let me win games. And all those hints were added. Asking me for a date after work, when I had travel to KL back and forth, you were there to fetch me. You were not even on my list or prospect but you just came at the right time.🥰😇

Happy birthday! 🎂🎉


Happy birthday to you my dear, babe!
May God continue to guide you, shower you blessings and maybe sprinkle your ears with water so you can start to listen to me. 😂And so, I am. Indeed, we can do this together with God’s help and grace.❤️
May God always bless you, protect you and help you in every steps of the way. God will make all our dreams come true!🙏😇🤗
Thank you for always being there to be a father of our children and  husband. May you continue to seek the Lord, trust with all your heart and continue to do His will.
Happy birthday, daddy! 🎉🎂😇🙏❤️

Quarantine in Our Own Bubble

Early breakfast with these three

It has been almost two months since New Zealand went into COVID-19 alert level 4. It has been a roller coaster ride juggling these three musketeers in our own bubble. Yes, it is for every household that have kids that couldn’t stay still and do nothing. But I thank God that we survived! 😇🙏

At first, it was a blessing. I am a full-time mom with sidelines in between (though I do hope I can get an opportunity to get back to a full-time job that I like to do). With the quarantine, I don’t have to bring Russell and Ethan to school. No need to get up so early and prepare everything for them. We managed easily with my husband working from home, yet still there to help me prepare an early breakfast for the kids because they normally wake up too early. No more need to rush to the kitchen and cook whatever I could find easy for them to eat, no need to prepare lunch boxes, and no need to give them a very early shower. However, the consequences were way different as expected. How do we keep three energetic kids entertained throughout the day? 🤣

Piano session while the youngest wants to join
Piano session with Ethan and Russell
Playing amazing grace
Over the rainbow

We thank God for we can divert the kids’ attention to playing the piano keyboard. It’s a blessing for they are getting more attached to music. It gives them more things to do, keeps them entertained, and at the same time they learn at their own pace. I don’t know how I could have survived these three without the keyboard.

Drawings and more

When the kids are not playing the piano, the kids resort to either drawing or building with Lego. By the end of the first week of lockdown, the kids ran out of paper to write or draw on. Luckily, we got 2 reams of A4 papers from Countdown. Yes, the kids love the Plants vs. Zombies game. From playing on the phones, to watching Youtube videos, to drawing, and even building Legos – they even sing the theme song together that add up to more noise in the house. I literally tried to stop them from watching and playing this game. However, on their own time, they draw all these Plants characters. So what can I do? It keeps them occupied. 😂

Reading session

When Russell was 3, he could easily read books – even books that are at a higher level. As for Ethan, he is so independent that he learns to read on his own pace. The advantage of teaching your first child early will help the younger child to learn from the older. It was easy, and this added up to their daily activities.

Some experiment from online learning
Some activities from online learning

School wasn’t totally out during the lockdown. The school provided an app where the teacher can provide activities that the kids can do. It’s good that they have interaction with school activities online. It was difficult because the kids’ focus were into playing instead. It’s during these times that we learned to appreciate teachers and their patience in managing not just one or two kids, but a bunch of them. 🤣

Now that we’re down to level 2, the kids can go back to school. We decided as parents to let them go and learn from school. The school is doing their part to ensure that the risk of infection is low. 😇🙏

Food plating add up more fun
Learning to cook different flavors
Eating their favorite Spanish bread

Finally, the lockdown gave us a lot of opportunities to learn new things, or do things that we couldn’t before due to lack of time. It was a good time for baking and cooking their favorite food. It was really a challenge for me to get them to increase their appetite and eat healthier food. At least, now that they have no choice but to eat home cooked food, they get to try and eat healthy foods that are unfamiliar for them.

Learning to play piano keyboard

It’s been a few weeks since the start of school holidays and two weeks since we bought a keyboard piano for Russell. He was really determined when he asked me to buy him a keyboard so he can practice on the real instrument instead of only playing on the phone with a piano app. I was like observing him first while he was playing on my phone, but gave my OK when I saw how he’s really trying to learn. I told him we will give it a go, but we’re quite hesitant to buy a keyboard in case he’ll just play around. In the end, we got him a cheaper one so we won’t regret it in case it’s a short-lived passion 😅.

I personally wanted to learn how to play the piano. There was a piano where we stayed at back when we were in Singapore. But my heart was pre-occupied with so many other things, so I think it wasn’t my cup of tea 😆. When Russell asked me if he can have a piano, it ignited a spark in my heart and wanted to jump in and learn how to play the piano, too.

Hearing my son wanting to learn how to play the piano, it triggered a memory of our travel to New Zealand to settle down here along with my husband and our only son, Russell (Russell was only 15 months old then. Ethan and Johann were not even conceived yet 😅). We transitted in Melbourne, and Russell had his first encounter with a real piano there.

I remember, we first ate at Jack’s burgers when we arrived in Melbourne. After that, we decided to stroll around in the airport while waiting for our connecting flight to Auckland. We saw a piano by the side near where people are passing by. Since no one was using it, I just let Russell sit down to take his picture pretending to play the piano. And when he tried it, it wasn’t really bad even though he didn’t know what he was doing. I let him do what he wanted, and, while at it, we noticed that he got surprised looks and smiles from other passengers and flight crews that were passing by. It was a short while, but, very likely, I guess, he got this connection, sparking his interest to learn how to play the piano 😘💕.

We don’t need to enroll him for piano lessons for now, though we got him to start learning by following instructions from a piano app on the phone. He started with the free contents (the intro to the basics) and then we got him a subscription so he can continue learning with the premium contents. He is a fast learner and I hope he will succeed by continuing to learn to play the piano. He is really persistent to learn. Now, he knows how to read notes and chords just by following the app. Since I have zero experience with the piano, I can only encourage him while at the same time, also learning from him 💓😍.

Ethan’s Sunflower 5 months later…


It has been 5 months since Ethan brought his sunflower back from kindy to raise it at home. The children planted their sunflowers from seeds last year, mid August. And now, his sunflower still keeps on flowering. 😍 We’re very amazed with his sunflower – it’s very different from the rest of his classmates’ sunflowers that only have 1 flower each.

Ethan is learning how to take care of his plant, he always wants to see the flower buds forming, and from there, he learned that it takes 30 days for them to bloom. It’s not just Ethan that is learning. It’s my first time to plant sunflower and I’ve also learned a lot about how to plant a sunflower.

I’ve googled a bit and learned about the sunflower’s life cycle
(credit goes to   https://www.ftd.com/blog/design/when-do-sunflowers-bloom). The sunflower goes through five stages during its life cycle. The germination phase begins the sunflower’s life. The vegetative phase then takes place when the plant grows leaves. Soon after, the reproductive phase occurs, and the flower bud forms. The blooming phase then follows, and the flower is fully grown. Once the flower is in full bloom, we’ll have about 20 days to enjoy the beauty of the flower.

Since sunflowers are annual plants. It takes about 110 -125 days to get the sunflower to mature and the seeds are ready to be harvested. It means that if Ethan’s sunflower was planted in mid August, his plant should die late in December last year.

Ethan’s sunflower is different, though. His sunflower keeps on flowering even when the main flower pod (the one on the very top of the plant) had already reached its maturity – usually, sunflower plants get only 1 flower, and then that’s it. So, on Ethan’s sunflower, the main flower pod seeds have ripened, and the birds started eating them. I had to harvest the seeds before the birds could finish off everything. In total, there were 117 seeds, with 5 eaten by the birds. I have trimmed the withered leaves and flower pods, but there are still a couple blooming. The kids have enjoyed the vibrant color of the sunflowers for more than 2 months now. The bees also loved buzzing around the flowers from day to day. The sunflower has lasted for a few months now. We wonder, how much more will the plant last? 💓😍

A day outside the house. ☺️

When you have kids that are so active and have much more energy than you 😀, it’s always very lively. Sometimes, it’s even excruciating when you either don’t have time to go out to bring them to the park to play, or you just want to stay home. You need to always have activities ready for them to shave off their excess energy.

This morning, I asked Russell and Ethan to read their books instead of watching their favourite interactive Netflix show, You vs Wild. It’s one of those days that they complied without much complaints. There are times that it’s difficult to get them to read, and when it’s that time and things are tough, I have to give them options.

After reading, I planned for them to enjoy the nice weather outside the house by setting up their bouncy swimming pool. However, Ethan kept on begging to try the Paw Patrol paint set he received last weekend from his tito and tita. Since it’s a nice weather outside, I guess today is a good time to do some painting with the kids outside by the deck.

To start it off, I asked Ethan what colour he wanted so I could help him open the paint tube. First, he asked for red for Marshall’s hat and clothes. When he was done with Marshall, he asked for pink to colour Sky. However, there was no pink in the paint set and told him so. He asked me to combine red and white (good job knowing your colour combinations, Ethan). We learned different colour combinations as we continue along with his masterpiece.

On any other day, the kids enjoy doing things outside like observing the bees buzzing around while I water the plants. Most of the time, they bring their toys outside by the deck and play while I prepare their breakfast. During summer, when the sun is out and the weather is nice, i let them play in their inflatable swimming pool. We got them a big pool more than 2 years ago and they really enjoyed it. However, keeping the big pool clean is tedious, so we got them an inflatable one that is so much easier to setup and dismantle – best of all, no maintenance required.

Today, my husband came home early, so he set up the pool for the kids while I change them to their swimming gears. A couple of water balloons, water guns, and bubble blasters, and the kids really enjoyed, albeit a bit shivering. It was a fun-filled day for the kids. They enjoyed each other’s company outside, and of course, the splashing water. 😍

Biking and walking 😀

What do the kids normally do during their holidays? The kids would love to stay home as long as they get to play video games on smart phones. And so, most of the time, we  encourage them to go outside to the park to play, and sometimes, ride their bikes.  NZ has lots of outdoor activities (at least during summer). The kids are lucky there are parks at almost every corner – there’s even one just behind our house. I guess, they don’t need to have so many toys (but they do – makes tidying up a chore)🤣 Parks are easy to access here but they can also just go outside to our backyard (if daddy’s not too lazy to mow the grass). Sometimes, they wanted to explore more outside so we will bring their bikes with them.Going outside to the park gives us opportunity to have bonding together and  to go for an exercise. We can walk around the playground while our kids are biking too. Having three active boys, I don’t get a chance to visit a gym or do my own exercise. My husband and I take this opportunity to work out. We take turn walking around the area while the other looks after the kids.

As parents we want to give our kids the best by spending time with them going out to parks, beaches, playgrounds, malls or just giving them activities while staying at home. Every Wednesday, our oldest attends his after school karate class in his school, while the other two kids stay mostly with me at the large open area within the school grounds. Normally, we bring bikes for them to ride while we wait.

We got our oldest son his first bike (a real bike, not a trike) on his 3rd birthday about 3 years ago. He is still learning how to balance, and so, his bike still has training wheels. I remember my first bike ride. It was a bigger bike without training wheels – training wheels weren’t a thing back then. I’m very thankful that my kids can learn how to bike with training wheels. And now, my oldest is too big for his first bike, so we got him a bigger one (still with traning wheels 😛 ) while his old bike is being passed down to our second son. The trike with parent handle is in turn being handed down to the littlest one. That is one big advantage of having all boys in the family – at least for us parents. No need to buy new things all the time 😍.

This New Year holiday, my husband is on-call so we just spent the new year walking around in the city. We parked the car at my husband’s office building in the city viaduct, and then we started walking towards the city centre. We finished the walk by having an early dinner in our favorite Malaysian food in the city centre before heading back. We even got to tour my husband’s office.

It was a great way to explore the city. The kids enjoyed the view. Even Johann enjoyed the entire walk, for there was construction everywhere, and there were cranes, bulldozers, and excavators all around. Hopefully, we get some more time walking around while it’s still summer.

First Saver

Today, we give our kids a kickstart to their savings by opening each of them their very own bank accounts. It has been a long overdue project. And now that we have finally opened their own savings accounts, I am happy that I can start to teach my children to value money and save for their future.

How can the kids have their own savings when they are not yet making their own money? Over the years, the kids received monetary gifts from everyone, especially from my sisters and their ninongs and ninangs (God parents). These monetary gifts were either spent buying clothes, toys, or doing other activities. Now that they have their own savings accounts, all or part of the monetary gifts will go to their savings.

As parents, we value what they have received not because our kids do not know yet the value of savings, but we wanted to give what are for them and make them decide what to do when they are ready. Once they’ve learned how to value money and manage them wisely, they’ll have more access to their accounts. 

Why not just give them a piggy bank to put their money into? Yes, it is also an option. However, based on experience, having it at arms’ reach will not help them to grow and understand – it’s too easy to break whenever “necessity” comes.

When I was young, I didn’t know the value of saving. I had my first savings account after I received my first pay check when I was about 16 years old. At that age, I had lots of things that I wanted to spend on, so I didn’t really manage to save.  I have learned to value it since, though, more especially now that I have my children.

It is good to give our children this opportunity and encourage them early to save for the future – not only because they will have something for their future but also save for a rainy day. Give a child toys and gifts, and he will be happy and thank you today. Teach him how to save, and he will thank you in the years to come 🙂 🙏

Perfect Gift

It is happiness for a mother to see her children receive gifts on their birthdays and, of course Christmas celebrations. As a mother, it is my joy to see them opening their gifts. I am overwhelmed with gratitude that they have gifts that they enjoyed so much – not only one or two gifts, but so many. I want to see so much their reactions when they open their gifts. I am proud of them that they don’t expect anything but just enjoy what surprise they could get from them, a joyful thing to remember.☺️

It is good to see a pile of gifts they have received. However, teaching your kids to give, for me, is more important. Even our Lord Jesus teaches us that it is better to give than to receive. While this does not work for the kids right now as they just want to receive gifts on Christmas, but teaching them to give is one way of teaching them to be godly – for as the Bible says, our main duty as parents is to raise our kids in the ways of God, fearful and obedient to Him.

As parents, we must ingrain the importance of giving into our children’s hearts.  When they receive, they smile and their hearts are full of joy. But when they give, they give joy and happiness to another person instead. We give our children the best gift that makes them feel loved and cared for, not because they deserved it but because we love them. In the same way, giving makes others feel loved and appreciated. Giving shows others they are important. To give even if not deserved, yet they have been given love.

In the Bible, what is the most important gift we could ever receive from God? His son, Jesus. God has given us His only begotten son to give us a path to salvation. Some think they have to do good, and then they’ll receive their just reward that is salvation. But God’s gift of salvation, just like any other gift, is free – we only need to accept it, and it’s ours. We can keep on doing and doing good works, but without receiving God’s gift, our good works fall short (Romans 3:23). For Jesus is the truth, the way, and the life. He is the only way to the Father. And if we don’t accept Him as our Lord and Savior, all our good works is for naught. In short, the best gift is the gift that we don’t deserve, yet freely given to us.

For children, it is easy to give them what they want. They will feel joy from a simple piece of gift. But all these gifts last,  are outgrown, or handed down to someone else who will cherish it in turn. But the perfect gift of God doesn’t end and cannot be outgrown. We sure can’t hand it down to our kids or anyone, but we can guide them towards accepting that gift. For each of us has been offered God’s gift – a gift, once accepted, will be cherished forever.☺️

Before I sleep on Christmas eve

What is the meaning of Christmas for me?

When I was younger, about the age of my first son, to be honest, I had no idea what Christmas was about. Why do we celebrate Christmas? Christmas was just a yearly celebration where you receive gifts, eat ham and cheese on the table, and having a lot of food to eat during Noche Buena (Night before Christmas).

One Christmas that we were away from  our family, I remember my twin and I went to bukid (rice fields) in Quezon province with other kids that we don’t know, to go around houses to say “mamamasko po” (It’s a Christmas version of trick or treating) and receive Christmas gifts and/or money. When we return home, we count what we have collected, and then buy whatever we wanted – such as the bread that we liked, and of course, candies!

As the years pass by, all I thought was that Christmas was just about caroling, simbang gabi (night mass – or more like dawn mass), gifts, xmas tree, and too many food on the table. All these, but not what had happened 2000 years ago, that the Son of God came down from heaven to redeem us from our sins and be our Saviour.

And as I grow older, now that I have my own kids, I feel like  as parents, we are responsible for our children – to teach them and tell them that Xmas was in celebration of Jesus Christ being born to save us – hence, CHRISTmas. As a believer, we were given a chance to be redeemed from the original sin, and receive eternal life from God.

Even if my children sometimes don’t listen, I encourage them and teach them that Christmas is not just about receiving gifts. It is not about glamorous Christmas decorations. The most important thing is simply to remember that Christmas is a celebration of Jesus Christ being born. We cannot just teach them every year, but what we can do is to join them everyday in their simple prayer that they should not forget.😘☺️

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